Feb 16, 2012

in the hospital

I guess I will start at the beginning. Monday morning I woke up in a spectacularly horrible mood. I was insufferably cranky towards Y. By mid-morning I was having fairly intense cramping. Unfortunately, I have had quite a bit of cramping throughout this pregnancy and as a result, I have spent a lot of time wondering whether my pain means something bad or whether it's in the realm of normal. The pain was pretty persistent and honestly I was very uncomfortable, so I decided to leave work in the early afternoon to rest.

That afternoon I was gripped by panic - not because of the cramping, but because I was feeling terrified by the pregnancy in general. It was like a red panic light was going off in my head and I had no idea why. I just was very scared that something terrible was going to happen. I told Y that I thought maybe I should see a therapist - that perhaps after all we had been through infertility-wise, my anxiety was out of control and I wasn't coping well.

In the morning I was still a little uncomfortable but excited to head to our first detailed (aka level 2) scan. The scan went really well - both babies look great and we found out we're expecting a little boy and a little girl. The only thing that was totally bizarre was that I broke out in a cold sweat during the middle of the scan and suddenly felt extremely nauseated.

I went to work in the lab and when I went to pee there was a little blood. I thought it was probably a little irritation from the cervical length check, but then blood started gushing out. Not what I was expecting to see at all. Thankfully, the emergency room is within a 5 minute walk of my research lab. I was very confused given that I just had a good ultrasound, but the ultrasound in the hospital showed a 5cm placental detachment of baby alef's (our son's) placenta. I have been hospital since then. There is really nothing to do at this point but bedrest and to pray that the separation heals. This morning's ultrasound was good, but needless to say, we're pretty scared and we've got a long way to go.

16 comments:

  1. Thinking of you and your littles ones... how scary for you. Rest up and sending you love and thought from a far xoxo

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  2. I hope it heals, will be thinking of you and the babies.

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  3. Praying for you and the twins.

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  4. Sending you all the prayers I've got for you and your little boy and girl.

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  5. My pregnancy with my now six-year-old landed me in the hospital for 12 weeks with a subchorionic haematoma and preterm labor. Best of luck to you. I'm glad to hear you are getting good care.

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  6. Thinking of you and sending lots of hope and prayer for healing!

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  7. Oh, how scary! Sending you love and good healing thoughts.

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  8. I am so sorry! Sending you and your babies lots of healing thoughts and prayers.

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  9. Sending lots of prayers and positive thoughts. I am so sorry you're going through this!

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  10. That is very scary, but it sounds like it did not worsen, and you are under good care. Sending you lots of positive thoughts and good luck wishes!

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  11. Keeping you and the little ones in my thoughts and prayers.

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  12. Sending the strongest of prayers your way. Doesn't your placenta know this is not condusive to relieving stress in the least bit! :0) Get lots of rest and heal up.

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  13. Thinking of you! I hope everything heals up!

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  14. Write some more, I want to know how you are doing. If you can, that is. Hoping it's all ok.

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  15. Thanks for the thoughts and prayers, ladies! It means a lot to me to know others are thinking of our little ones.

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